Susan Lager, LICSW, BCD, CPC

Over-Thinking Decisions

I've been thinking a lot lately about over-thinking. People like me, who are a bit perfectionistic and a bit obsessive, are often guilty of it. In my case, I was set up for it by a family that made a production out of EVERYTHING from the contents of a din... Read >

The Couplespeak Marriage Fitness Test - A Ten Point Checkup Measuring Marital Health And Wellbeing

In my years of private practice specializing in couples therapy, I have come to some central truths about elements vital to marital health and the prognosis for intimate relationships based on ten critical factors. Give yourself and your spouse a giant se... Read >

"How Do I Get My Partner Back?" A Therapist's Reflection On The Question And The Road Through Grief

I was near the end of another therapy session with Marla, who had been dumped by her live-in partner of ten years, and was still trying to make sense of the loss of her relationship with the "love of her life". What had she done wrong? Why didn't he want ... Read >

Couples And The Neglected Practice Of Gratitude

It's a rainy Wednesday night in New England, (what else is new?), and I'm thinking about the fullness of my work and the emptiness of people's lives. As a psychotherapist, once again I've had a number of encounters with couples who wrestle with disappoint... Read >

Radically Improve Your Relationship In 50 Days With 5 Behavioral Shifts

As a seasoned couples therapist and coach, there are some key behaviors I have witnessed which amplify positive changes in relationships very fast. Behaviorists claim it takes only 21 days to form a new habit. Watch for amazing results in 50! 1. SHOW A... Read >

7 Steps To Forgiving Your Spouse After An Affair

When an affair has been discovered, it's generally a devastating event in a relationship, both for the "hurt partner and the "offending partner." Trust is seriously shaken, and there is a breach in the experience of intimacy and unity, through the discove... Read >

How To Avoid Disasters At Holiday Family Events

With the holidays almost upon us, many people begin to get very anxious or sad in anticipation of expanded family contact. It might be an alcoholic parent who is volatile and explodes, or says or does something inappropriately too familiar and out of boun... Read >